THE ONE WITH TOP GUN AND SLICED STRAWBERRIES

"Maverick you big stud, take me to bed or lose me forever."

Ok, does he not look a little like Maverick?

Last weekend, Coach and I ended up spending quite a bit of time together with our kids. 


One night involved taking the kids out for pizza, nicklemania and watching Top Gun. I absolutely LOVED watching Coach whip out his little kid side and challenge the kids to shooting hoops on the basketball machine. 


Afterwards, we went back to my place and watched Top Gun. I brought up the fact that he kinda looks like the Tog Gun version of Tom Cruise a little bit and he told me that he's actually been told that before and been called "Top Gun" or "Maverick". I think it's his hair and his blue eyes that does it! We may have to start using the Top Gun gif's again! Keum Gray I'm counting on you, haha! Let's not mention the person we originally used these on, we need a redo!! 


Coach is such a stud. Like really though, very attractive! 


The next night we went to his daughters basketball game, then out to a fun old fashioned ice cream diner with the kids, and ended the night watching Unbroken with the kids. That's a humbling show, highly recommend it! 

THE PART WITH THE STRAWBERRIES

Sunday was a dinner invitation at his moms. I reached out to her to ask her what I could bring to help and she asked me to bring some cut up strawberries for shortcake. 


SLICED STRAWBERRIES!


Let me tell me you my history with sliced strawberries.


I grew up in a wonderful home, fabulous childhood life. I really am blessed to come from that, and have such great family ties.


However, sometimes generational patterns are passed down, and sometimes they are great, and sometimes they aren't and you've gotta be the one to break that pattern.


My mom is a fantastic lady, full of poise, very intelligent and well accomplished. Smart, hard working, beautiful. 


She grew up in a home with a mother who was quite critical, judgemental and a little harsh. 


That's the pattern. The pattern we've tried to break. 


What my mom doesn't realize, is that while she has good intentions, sometimes her "correcting" of our behavior or the way we do things, also made us feel very insecure and for me added to my feelings of not being good enough. 


The easiest way to explain it is with sliced strawberries. I was asked to cut some strawberries for a salad we were serving for a big family dinner, and apparently I was not cutting them in the right direction. Mom stepped in, corrected was I was doing and finished the job.


This happened with alot of things, especially in the kitchen. Obviously being corrected in the kitchen is not a big deal, and my siblings and I eventually made a joke out of it and would purposely do something wrong to stress mom out knowing she'd take over the job and we'd be off the hook, haha! 


We were punks sometimes. 


But what mattered was other things she might have been critical about. Grades, the way we looked, the way we spoke, etc etc. In her mind, she was just trying to help us to be better. And for the most part, she was helping us to be better. Kids need guiding, and need help learning manners and such. But sometimes what we think as a parent is "better", is really just an idea we have in our mind of our kids fitting into our box of how we see the world. 


It's taken me alot of years to gain my own self confidence, and be ok knowing my mother may not agree with the way I do things, or the way I think. I'm a natural people pleaser, especially a parent pleaser, so this has been tough, 


I had to laugh when Coach's mom asked me to bring sliced strawberries, and a little ptsd came flooding back and I stressed for a minute about which way to slice them. 


I sliced them in half circles in case you were wondering, and I really don't give a damn if it's the right way or wrong way to cut them for short cake. 


Do it YOUR WAY. 


That's the whole point of being here in this world, to blaze your own path, your own trail, and do YOU. 


I turned out just fine. And I absolutely love my mother and I am proud to be her daughter. 


One of my favorite things about this weekend was watching Coach help his mom with dinner. I love how he takes care of her. That says alot about a man. 


He and I are due for some kid free time this week! We've earned it! Looking forward to that!

-SJ

The Boutique Bachelorette